Excerpted from . . .

I like this.
Thought you may, too. Excerpted from http://www.adventuresinloserville.com/2013/09/04/what-ive-learnt-from-being-in-a-relationship/

  • Emotional Rollercoaster:
    One would hope that falling in love would be a peaceful, calm journey. Alas by falling in love you choose to forfeit your own ability to control your emotions. This one mere person now has the power to set your heart pounding into a frenzy with a soft, slow kiss; make you laugh uncontrollably to the point where you almost lose bladder control; make a simple, beautiful gesture which brings you to the point of almost shedding a tear out of sheer joy. You don’t need that kind of instability. That kind of erratic behaviour can’t be good for you.

Love: Don’t fall for it.

If you ever find that you have fallen in love with someone, please follow this advice: Inform an adult of your situation and plan a safe exit.
It’s for your own good.
Friends don’t let friends form meaningful relationships.

Although you are probably off now doing who knows what with whom knows ?
I guess I am having a day less interested in that flight of fear-filled fantasies as much as what they represent – the hurt behind them. You don’t want me. And, then, creeping in is some weird negative energy sort of hoping you are suffering, depressed and stuck.

But, that won’t last. I just am hurt. Thought you might want to know but oh, that’s right. You removed me from your social media circles now, too. Funny, in the ‘before time’ when a person stopped talking to you they just went away. Now, all these threads of connection we can maintain a link or a face or a tweet. And, each severing of an e-cord is a painful reminder that even though YOU said you’d wait for me and wanted to spend Forever together, either your Forever has a different egg-timer on it or . . .

See, You got scared. You had everything You ever wanted in me, from Me in You cock ‘n soul, rock ‘n roll, skin ‘n bones, emotional fullness, psychological depth and spiritual awakening to contour our physical sweat-ins. But, You are a nervous, medicated and anxious soul I could never quite quiet down to just Be, to just lay still with Me except for the last time. Then, far away so close you found a way to ramp up again, go back to live in Your head and Your fears and Your dread, then lay it all on me and tell me what I needed to do where and when.

I protested, albeit a bit out of sorts and not quite with the measure and respect a well-bred Princess deserves. But, your zero-tolerance for anything outside your boundaries of acceptable terms and definitions, your well-honed legal mind’s choice to both make and bend the rules at once, your inability to see your actions as provocative only my reactions as attacks. . .

All that justifiable You versus unacceptable Me.

And, I am alone. Again. Naturally.

You smile on in your social media toasts and poolside cheers, party to a suppressive friend who says ‘only say nice about others’ even as she doomed us. That’s the cul de sac you want. That’s the life you need. Who am I to disagree? I simply feel the Pain, knowing We, Siempre, is now lost, Siempre. Fear won. You lose.

 

The Nourishing Love

The Nourishing Love

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s